Gak, it hurts but confidence building

Mini update, not that there's much to say. Last month, I ran Harry's Spring 5K with a bunch of former university paper staffers, making good on a promise we made to each other last year when we coincidentally came together at this race. It hurt. It hurt bad. My breathing was off, my strides were all wrong, my arms felt alien to me. Oh and it was so cold and windy which set the stage for miserable attitude anyway. My 5K time was kind of embarrassing -- 34:47.o chip -- though much better than my prediction that I'd finish in 40-45 minutes, that's how much confidence I had heading into it. But that's what I get for running less than I can count on one hand since... well let's not even review that. 

I then missed out on the Sporting Life 10K -- one of my favorite races in this city -- because I *forgot* to sign up. Just as well because after my performance at Harry's, I was too scared to go out and train for it, didn't have the will to even try. As if I'm not scared enough as it is, I've recently agreed with J from work to sign up for the Toronto half-marathon in October (151 days to go). And the midterm goal is to hit a 10 miler in the summer (60 days to race day).  

So today, as I wind down my hours in cottage country (CMan whisked me away to the resort we stayed at for our honeymoon for a long weekend), I laced up my shoes and ran a little, from the resort to the turn-in off the highway (which the sign says is 2K one way). It wasn't easy but there's something about running on backcountry roads that's so much more something something than city asphalt. And there was a hot tub with a magnificent view of the lake at the end of it. 

It was a good start in that I started. If I can get two or three more runs in this week, I'm sure it'll become a habit again. Confidence will rebuild, but it's baby steps. Sometimes I still marvel at how I dragged myself cross that finish line in Chicago, but obviously I can do it. I can repeat the slow build to achieving that personal goal if I want to. And I want to. Because lately I've been feeling as useful as a sack of potatoes...Maybe even resembling!